Building a successful mentoring relationships.

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By BASHEER LUQMAN OLAREWAJU-UNIQUE.

It is no news that we are in the generation of people who give up easily on issues that are too nugatory to merit attention; how easier it is to console a lad whose mother died as a predator of a wolf? This life is nothing but a bitter honey!

To get to a destination with ease and as fast as possible, one needs a proper guidance and monitoring. It is in similitude to the human life voyage; there should be a shepherd who will spot the light in one and redefine such person to be positioned to a spotlight.

Dear Mentor, I have something to discuss with you today and maybe for the most part of your life time, I wouldn’t want to bore you with tales but I do know, a worthy mentor would always be a good listener.

You are two humans in one body: to some people, you are direct mentor and there are usually many moments of conversations, while to others, you are a distant admirer; they love you because they have felt your ingenuity and laudable style of leadership, most times, you have never met.

In reality, these two mentees are important and thence, there is a need for you to be cautious. You cannot satisfy everyone but, your actions should quench their tastes. Don’t ignore People who are willing to learn from you, besides, there is a modus operandi of having Mentee in different ways.

Some people are dying from within and they wish to hear your voice or feel your sense of commitment, it is truthful that you are busy and preoccupied with your life’s compunctions but it is essential to know that someone somewhere is also in need of your attention; mitigation system is an important device in mentoring.

Dear Mentor, it is important to share skills, knowledge, and expertise. A good mentor is willing to teach what he/she knows and accept the mentee where they currently are in their professional development. Good mentors can remember what it was like just starting out in the field.

Dear Mentor, you are chosen by your mentees for several reasons best known to them, but, there are certain elements need to be highlighted: relevant expertise or knowledge, enthusiasm for sharing that expertise, a respectful attitude, eagerness to invest in others, the ability to give honest and direct feedback, reflective listening and empathy and also willingness to be a sponsor.

Charge your mentees to understand that; sometimes you win in what you are doing, other times you learn. Accept the fact that not everyone will be with you forever and sometimes you might be hurt but then you have to let things be so others can be happy.

To the mentees: Not everyone you love will love you back, don’t expect people to be nice to you because you are a nice person, accept not expecting too much from someone because humans can be disappointing. Never do good things with the hope of getting something else in return, you will lose more and more friends as you grow up. Sometimes, the person you care about the most is the person that will hurt you the most. Putting in too much effort doesn’t guarantee immediate success or results, rejections and failures will happen to you at one point in life.

Be prepared for change, trust your mentor. Be an active listener; be authentic and be committed. Challenge yourself and don’t expect to be promoted; expect to be promotable.

Accept that there will be a time when you need to start fending for yourself, note that, you will make mistakes and take stupid decisions; don’t expect people to have the level of understanding as you have, there are days it will seem everything is going wrong and downhill, you need to walk away from some people to maintain peace of mind.

your mentor probably has a very demanding job. He or she has volunteered to take on the added responsibility of mentoring. Please be appreciative of his or her time and investment; respond in a timely manner to your mentor’s questions and comments. If you don’t have the time to respond at the time, send a short message letting him or her know you will be in contact when you have the opportunity.

You can expect a certain level of support and advice from a mentor, but he or she can’t solve your problems for you. Perhaps the most valuable quality a mentor can offer is perspective. A mentor can put the situation in perspective, offer feedback, serve as a sounding board, and identify resources that may be helpful to you.

In conclusion, Communicate clearly. Initiate contact with your mentor if you have questions or need to discuss something. Identify your needs and communicate them as clearly as possible to your mentor. It may be helpful to put some focused energy into organizing your thoughts and concerns before talking to your mentor, so that the time is spent wisely.

Clearly articulate personal and professional needs. Assume responsibility for your own professional growth and development listen both to what is being said and how it is being said. Establish goals and make decisions to achieve those goals. Spend time reflecting on your achievements, be receptive to constructive feedback.

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